


Flicking through your pages

by Lulu_The_Real_Slytherpuff



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Character Observation, Coming Out, Friendship, Gay Character, Gen, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, POV Outsider, Panic Attack, Platonic Cuddling, Unrequited Love, Willy is sad and Zach notices being the good friend he is, Zach Hyman is too good and pure for this world
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-01
Updated: 2018-03-01
Packaged: 2019-03-25 09:52:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13831683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lulu_The_Real_Slytherpuff/pseuds/Lulu_The_Real_Slytherpuff
Summary: To everyone else, Willy was an open book, regaling the team with stories of what it was like to grow up with an NHL player, and living in Sweden. And that was enough to satisfy them, to keep the team off his back about whatever he was truly thinking up there in his head.





	Flicking through your pages

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> I'm finally back with another crappy story that's unbeta'ed, unedited and written in about an hour. 
> 
> I apologise for the lack of posting - uni just started back up, as well as hockey and work taking up all of my time. 
> 
> Couple warnings:  
> \- character has a panic attack (not in detail)  
> \- some homophobia from an outside character
> 
> Enjoy :)

As loud and as rambunctious William Nylander was, he was a closed book. That was the first thing that Zach noticed. He was always a presence in the locker room and on the ice, something about Willy that always demanded that the attention be on him.  To everyone else, Willy was an open book, regaling the team with stories of what it was like to grow up with an NHL player, and living in Sweden. And that was enough to satisfy them, to keep the team off his back about whatever he was truly thinking up there in his head.

 

Enough to satisfy everyone but Zach, that is. You don’t become lineys with someone and not expect to be able to notice their little quips and quirks, or how they think or feel. It’s a liney thing; the result of spending so much time together both on and off the ice, that they’re able to tell when someone is upset, or whatever, and a given that they’ll come to each other when they need help.

 

In all of his years of hockey, Zach has experienced it with every single liney he’s had. That feeling of having an almost telepathic bond with them. He’s got it with Matts, he’s even been there to comfort Matts after a rough combination of homesickness and exhaustion that had left him sobbing in the middle of their hotel room with Zach stroking his hair and holding him whilst he let it all out.

 

The thing about Willy though, is that he’s never had one of those moments. His smile never dims, he’s always loud and laughing, and, well, it’s not like Zach wants Willy to be sad or upset but no one can be _that_ happy all the time, right? Not even Mitch is like that!

 

So, Zach just may be slightly concerned and a little offended that Willy doesn’t trust him or the team enough to let his guard down with them, not even for a second or two.

 

*

 

At least he is until they have morning practice the day of a home game against Boston, _fucking_ Boston.  Zach’s already half kitted up when Willy walks in, bags heavy and purple underneath his eyes and a frown on his face visible for only half a second before he paints on a grin that doesn’t quite reach his eyes and loudly announces to the room,

 

“Sup fuckers, whose ready for Boston tonight?”

 

He’s greeted by various chirps and ‘hellos’ before he sits down in his stall, across the room from Zach’s. And then Willy’s seemingly back to himself again, laughing loudly and teasing Matts and Mitchy for being co-dependent. But Zach’s already seen through the cracks, and if somethings got Willy like this, then Zach’s going to be the best liney ever and help him through it.

 

*

 

Willy’s up and gone out of the locker room before Zach’s even got his kit off. It’s not ideal but Zach will just have to wait until after the game. He finishes getting his kit off and heads to the showers, surveying the room before he heads out, yep, not a single one of them picked up on Willy’s bad mood.

 

*

 

The game against Boston is a tough one, as it always is. But his line is scoring, and getting the shots on net, the only downside is that Boston’s top line is also having the same luck. Zach can sense the frustration rolling off both Matts and Willy’s bodies, the games where they’re going one for one are the worst. Often leading them into overtime and a shootout, and not to sound too ungrateful about his job but Zach would really like to go home and sleep early tonight.

 

They’re back on the bench when Boston gets a penalty shot and Willy tenses up next to him. It’s not normally worrying except for the fact that Willy never tenses up during these things – his complete trust and faith in Freddie always keeps him relaxed. Zach turns to Willy, hesitantly, and oh, Willy’s eyes are glossy and he’s chewing on his mouthguard more than he usually does.

 

Bergeron takes the shot,

 

 

and misses.

 

Zach feels his shoulders ease but Willy, he stays tense all through the rest of the night.

 

*

 

They win but only in a shootout.

 

And the boys are all too willing to go out and grab a drink, and celebrate their win.

 

“Yo, Hymie, ya comin’?” Mitchy yells across the room to him.

 

“Think I’m good tonight Mitchy, might get some early sleep,” Zach shouts back, because he really is tired.

 

“What about you, Willy?”

 

Zach turns to look at Willy, and doesn’t miss the way he perks up and paints a smile on his face as he shakes his head.

 

“Might give it a miss too, tonight Mitchy.”

 

*

 

He catches Willy just before he makes his way to his car.

 

“Wanna talk about what’s on your mind, Willy?” Zach lays a hand on Willy’s shoulder and stops him from walking any further.

 

“Nothing’s on my mind, Hymie. Just wanna head home,” Willy sighs, and turns around, smiling softly at Zach.

 

“Bullshit.”

 

Willy’s eyes open in shock and he lets out a laugh while he jokingly punches Zach on the shoulder.

 

“I told you man, I’m fine, maybe a little stressed but we won the game.”

 

Zach sighs.

 

“You’re coming home with me and we’re going to talk about it,” Zach grabs Willy’s arm and drags him back in the opposite direction, back to his car.

 

It says a lot how much Willy doesn’t protest it.

 

*

 

They’re back at Zach’s apartment, Willy curled up on the sofa and clutching a mug of hot chocolate.

 

“Penny for your thoughts?” Zach nudges Willy slightly from where he sits.

 

Willy sighs and lets out a nervous laugh.

 

“Promise you’re not gonna laugh at me, right?”

 

Zach puts a hand on Willy’s shoulder.

 

“I promise.”

 

“Okay, so I uh – “Willy’s fiddling with the handle of the mug and making a huge effort to look at anywhere but Zach.

 

Zach rubs Willy’s shoulder and hopes the message comes across – _keep going._

“I told the person I love that I loved them last night,” Willy lets out another laugh but Zach doesn’t miss the way Willy’s eyes start to well up with tears.

 

“Oh Willy, I’m so sorry,” and that’s all it takes for Willy to break down, collapsing into Zach’s arms with loud, thick sobs.

 

They stay like that for a good twenty minutes before Willy has finally calmed down enough that Zach feels comfortable enough to ask what happened.

 

And just like that Willy tenses up again, staring at anything but Zach.

 

“I’m not going to judge you for it, I promise,” Zach pulls Willy in closer. “I’m your friend, Willy, not someone who’s going to hurt you.”

 

He feels Willy not against his chest.

 

“I-uh-I prepped this really nice dinner, like I spent time actually learning how to cook because I wanted to make it special, y’know, and anyway… I tell them and he – “

Willy gasps and turns to Zach with a horrified, fearful expression on his face. Shit. And Zach pulls Willy back in again, wraps his arm around him.

 

“And he what, Willy?” Zach asks, and this time Willy’s expression turns from fear to shock.

 

“You’re… you’re not mad at me?” Willy asks.

 

“Mad at you, Willy why would I be mad at you?”

 

“Because he was. Called me a fucking faggot and said I should go and kill myself.”

 

And Zach wants to punch whoever that asshole is.

 

“Willy, I couldn’t care less whether or not you’re gay, bi, trans or a fucking alien okay? You could tell me that you want to shave your hair into a Mohawk and dye it rainbow and I still wouldn’t judge you because it’s your life.”

 

“You mean that?”

 

“Of course I do.”

 

“And you’re not mad at me?”

 

“Willy, the only thing I’m mad at is the homophobic asshole who told you to kill yourself. I’m not mad that your…”

 

“Gay.” Willy supplies.

 

“Gay.”

 

“I’m so sorry that that happened to you.”

 

“Hymie?”

 

“Yeah, Willy?”

 

“Thank you.”

 

*

 

Zach is sitting in his stall before morning skate the next day when Willy arrives. He’s smiling, and although he’s still got the bags under his eyes, Zach can tell that today it’s genuine. Willy greets the room in his usual way,

 

“Sup fuckers,” only this time he nods at Zach, and Zach nods back.

 

And Willy goes back to being the loudest person in the room, regaling the team with his crazy stories. He’s still a closed book, but Zach has skimmed through the pages, even read a chapter or two, and he gets it now.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all enjoyed :)
> 
> Comments are always appreciated and hey, if you have any prompts send 'em through because my brain is lacking creativity at the minute :)
> 
> Thanks for reading :)
> 
> (Wow, I have used an alarming amount of smiley faces)
> 
> :) Guess you can never have enough of them anyway:)


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